Jarek Jarzębowski
7 minutes
October 1, 2024

The Story Goes First: Moran Weber from Women on Stage on Public Speaking and Overcoming Stage Fright

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When watching inspiring presentations at conferences, you may have the impression that the speakers naturally have the ability to draw the audience into their world. However, what we often perceive as natural and captivating storytelling is usually the result of hard work. In reality, imposter syndrome and stage fright are more common than you might think—even among the most experienced presenters.

Moran Weber’s story proves that with the right techniques and mindset, anyone can become a great speaker. In a conversation with Jarek Jarzębowski, she shares her inspiring journey of learning how to create compelling speeches and gain confidence. This is not just another inspirational talk; Moran offers a wealth of specific, practical tips on overcoming stage fright. Of course, everyone must find their own path, but there are tried-and-true strategies that can lead you to success on stage. Find out what they are!

Key Takeaways from the Conversation

Find inspiration in emotions: Finding the right idea can be a struggle. If you're stuck, dive into your emotions. Something that excites you, or a challenge you've recently overcome, can be a great basis for your speech.

Start with the story, not the slides: Don't start with the slides, but with the story. Write down the main points and the reasons why you want to talk about them. Highlight what is interesting about your topic. Once you have a cohesive narrative, it’s the perfect starting point for your slides.

Brainstorming is key: You can approach forming the story differently, whether by writing down everything that comes to mind or constructing and manipulating it with post-it notes. Start with brainstorming—it doesn’t have to be perfect at the beginning; you can refine it later.

Hook your audience early: You have just a few minutes to convince your audience that your presentation is worth listening to. Start with a story that serves as a hook to keep them on the edge of their seat. Then, introduce yourself as part of the story, making it more credible and engaging.

Understand and tailor to your audience: To create a great presentation, you need to understand your audience and match your content and structure to their knowledge level. Don’t get deceived by your own convictions—talk to someone, do the research. Structure your presentation to provide knowledge from general to detailed.

Set expectations with an agenda: The audience likes to know what to expect. Prepare them for what’s coming with an agenda slide. It will set expectations for the presentation and prevent the audience from getting lost in the content.

Practice out loud: Practice out loud on your own—it’s the best way to catch inconsistencies, spot awkward phrases, and get comfortable with your speech. Do a dry run with someone who represents the audience to test out your concept. Memorize the first few minutes of your speech to avoid getting blocked at the beginning.

Conversation with Moran Weber

Jarek Jarzębowski: Hello, Moran, and welcome to the Advocu podcast.

Moran Weber: Hello, Jarek. Thank you so much for having me.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Since not everyone knows you, could you please tell us a little more about yourself and your background?

Moran Weber: Sure. I'm the CEO and founder of Women on Stage, where we help women professionals, especially those in tech, become thought leaders. We also assist tech companies in attracting, retaining, and growing their female tech talent.

I used to be a developer and spent most of my career working as a software engineer at Wix, which is a great company. I'm also a social psychologist, and Women on Stage is where I combine all my passions. 

We help women, and also men, with creating better speeches, developing tech talks, and getting accepted into tech conferences worldwide. I love what I do, but I used to suffer from severe stage fright and imposter syndrome.

Jarek Jarzębowski: How did you overcome that?

Moran Weber: That's an interesting story. Most of my career, I couldn't even imagine going up on stage or speaking in front of hundreds of people. I could barely open my mouth in daily meetings because I was afraid of being exposed as a fraud if I said something wrong. 

About six years ago, I attended a presentation skills workshop at work. For the first time, people told me they wanted to hear what I had to say, and I was surprised. I discovered that I wanted to explore this more. I'll share some of my best tips for overcoming stage fright during this episode because it's very common.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Thank you for sharing that. Many people have stage fright and imposter syndrome, and we often think it's only us. But almost everyone feels it from time to time. You don't have to be a natural-born speaker – you can grow into the role. 

You mentioned that you had severe imposter syndrome, but beyond the presentation skills workshop, do you have any other tips for people who feel like their knowledge isn't special enough to share on stage?

Moran Weber: My best tip is that most people aren't born as speakers, but you can definitely learn how to do it and get better at it. Many people feel they don't have anything interesting or new to share, but I believe we all have important insights. 

People in tech do amazing and interesting things every day. The tech industry relies on knowledge sharing and hearing each other's stories. You encounter challenges, conflicts, and struggles daily, and if you share how you solve those problems, that's a very interesting story. It doesn't have to be on a global stage; it can be at a small meetup or even within your team. People want to hear our stories, challenges, and how we solve problems.

Jarek Jarzębowski: I agree. When we overcome a challenge, we often downplay its difficulty because we've already conquered it. But overcoming something doesn't mean it was easy—it just means we did it. Sharing that process can be valuable to others who might find it difficult. If we believe we have a story to share, how do we prepare for giving a speech? What’s the next step once we have a general idea?

Moran Weber: I totally agree with what you said about overcoming challenges. Once you have an idea, I want to stress that people often struggle with finding ideas. My tip for that is to think about the hardest thing you’/ve done recently or what excites you. When you’re passionate about something, those are the most interesting stories to share.

Once you have an idea, the most important thing is to start with your story, not the slides. Slides are there to support your message visually, not replace it. Start by writing down your story—your main point, why you want to talk about it, and why it’s interesting. This can be in bullet points or paragraphs, but focus on getting the structure of your message down first. Once you’ve written your story, then you can create slides to support it.

Starting with the text ensures your talk has a logical flow. When people start with slides, they often end up with a disjointed presentation. By starting with the story, you create a cohesive narrative, and then you can use slides to enhance that narrative.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Great advice. We'll dig deeper into how to prepare the story and shape it, but let me first share my recommendation for this process. I actually really like what you said but I'm using post-it notes, either physical or digital, like Miro board or Canva. They are very helpful with planning—you can move them around and structure them into the message, into the flow of the whole presentation. 

But what I really like about the post-it notes is the text limit. You need to be concise and think carefully about each point in your presentation. It helps to be direct, avoiding unnecessary details. How do you structure a message to make it more convincing and engaging?

Moran Weber: Regarding the post-it notes, that's a good idea. For some, it might be helpful to get everything out first, then refine it to be more succinct. Both approaches work, but the key is to brainstorm and then refine.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Absolutely. My approach isn’t the only way. I know people who prefer a brain dump first, then shaping it into the final presentation. But back to your question on making presentations interesting—how do you recommend structuring them?

Moran Weber: I always suggest starting with a story. Many people think it’s unnatural and prefer to introduce themselves first, but I believe starting with a hook is crucial. Your audience decides in the first few minutes if they want to keep listening. Starting with a story grabs their attention. 

After that, introduce yourself as part of the story. For example, when I talk about stage fright, I start with a story about my own experience before introducing myself. This way, the audience remembers my name and credentials better because they're connected to the story.

Jarek Jarzębowski: If this approach works so well, why do so many people start by introducing themselves and their companies instead of telling a story?

Moran Weber: People think it’s weird to start with a story because in normal conversations, we introduce ourselves first. They carry this into their presentations, thinking it's the same.

Jarek Jarzębowski: It might feel weird, especially if you're not used to public speaking. But even a brief story or introduction to the problem can draw people in. Over time, speakers can grow more comfortable with this method. Another point is understanding your audience—how important is it, and how do you approach it?

Moran Weber: Understanding your audience is crucial. You need to match your presentation to their knowledge. Often, we assume everyone knows what we do, but that's not always the case. Speak with someone who knows your audience or do a dry run with them. You can start by covering basic assumptions or terminology, and check if the audience is following. If you see they’re familiar, move on, but always be inclusive. This way, no one feels left out, and everyone can follow along.

Jarek Jarzębowski: I agree. Addressing both those who understand and those who don’t is important. It shows you understand your audience, making everyone feel included. Once you understand the audience and have their attention, how should you structure the rest of the presentation?

Moran Weber: It depends on your topic, but typically, after the story and introduction, you dive deeper into the story, explaining the motivation behind your topic and why the audience should care. You have to start with the "why." Simon Sinek talks about how great leaders and motivators always start with the "why." People care about why you do something, what your motivation is. For example, "I'm speaking about this because..." or "This topic is important because I spent months trying to solve it and thought others might have faced the same issue."

The next step is to align and share your agenda. It's important to structure your presentation by outlining what you’ll discuss. People like to know the structure in advance, so I usually recommend adding an agenda slide. This can come after the "why" or before it, depending on what makes more sense. An agenda slide sets expectations for the audience—they know what to expect and how much time it will take. I also recommend revisiting the agenda slide throughout the presentation to show progress, which helps the audience understand where they are in the presentation.

It's like a user experience issue in presentations—people want to know how much time is left or if they're almost done with a section. So it really helps to structure it this way. I think I've covered that topic, so maybe you should ask a question here.

Jarek Jarzębowski: That's really interesting. I haven’t seen many people use this technique of revisiting the agenda. Summarizing points is often helpful to link ideas, especially if someone hasn't been paying close attention. A short summary can be really helpful, especially in conferences.

Regarding visuals, I had a thought—it might be helpful to use color variations in your slides to visually divide the sections of your presentation. For example, light green for the first part, green for the second, and dark green for the third. It might make it easier for the audience to follow along.

Now, let’s say we’ve crafted the message, understood the audience, and prepared the presentation and visuals. How do you approach the delivery of the speech? How do you prepare and practice for it? What are your recommendations?

Moran Weber: Sure. I think practicing for the speech is even more important than creating the presentation itself. People often underestimate the amount of practice needed. Most people, before a presentation, might spend 30 minutes reading through their slides and notes. But that’s not enough.

Two things are crucial here: First, practice out loud on your own. This is so important because only when you practice out loud do you catch things you might forget or realize if something doesn’t make sense. Reading silently doesn’t give you the same feedback. 

I know it can feel weird to speak to yourself, but it’s the only way to really validate your message and check if you remember what you want to say. You don’t need to memorize everything, but you do need to practice multiple times.

Second, do a dry run with someone else, preferably someone who represents your target audience. This is like a code review for your presentation. You might think everything is perfect, but only when someone else reviews it can you discover if something doesn’t make sense or if you’re not covering all the bases. It’s the only way to validate that your audience will understand your message and find it interesting. They might even suggest improvements.

You don’t have to take every piece of feedback, but if you hear the same feedback from multiple people, it might mean you need to make a change.

Jarek Jarzębowski: I totally agree. Sometimes in my head, I sound really good, but when I actually speak out loud, it doesn’t sound as clever. So, speaking out loud is key. You can spot awkward phrases or ideas and notice where you might be repeating yourself unnecessarily. Recording yourself and watching it back can also give you insight into how your audience might perceive your presentation.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Regarding practicing in front of someone else, some people might hesitate because they don’t want to waste someone’s time. But it’s better to get feedback during rehearsals than to deliver an unpolished speech to a larger audience. Rehearsals are meant for failure so that you can improve later.

Moran Weber: Right.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Another big issue is stage fright. Even if we’re prepared, when we approach the stage, our heart is pounding, and we might forget everything we planned to say. How do you deal with that?

Moran Weber: Great question. It ties back to practicing and rehearsals. My most important tip is to memorize the first few minutes of your speech word for word. You don’t need to memorize the entire speech, especially for longer talks. 

If you make a mistake in the middle, it could throw you off. However, the first few minutes are crucial because that's when stress levels are the highest. If you're going to experience a blackout, it’s likely to happen in the beginning. Once you get past those first few minutes, things usually start to flow more smoothly.

You do need to rehearse everything and practice out loud to know what you're going to discuss. You don't want to be surprised by your own slides—that's awkward. Memorize only the first few minutes, and things will improve as you go. 

Additionally, I highly recommend carrying your own clicker. You can buy it anywhere, and it doesn't cost much. People often ask what to do with their hands, as putting them in pockets looks weird and unauthentic. But if you have a clicker, it's like a security blanket. It gives you control, and no one will notice if you squeeze it. Having a clicker in one hand makes the other hand’s gestures feel more natural. Psychologically, it really helps.

Another thing that helps with stage fright is reframing your anxiety as excitement. The hormones in your body when you're stressed or excited are usually adrenaline in both cases. What matters most is how you interpret the situation. Instead of saying, "I'm scared, I'm anxious, I'm going to fail," tell yourself, "I'm excited." It's the same hormones and neurotransmitters, but you feel much better when you're excited, and it makes things easier.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Definitely good recommendations.

Moran Weber: Yes, it makes it easier. And practicing, delivering speech after speech, makes stage fright much more manageable.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Let's hope our listeners will try to overcome their fright and imposter syndromes, apply for conferences, and deliver great speeches. Before we wrap up, do you have any final thoughts or recommendations that might be helpful for our listeners?

Moran Weber: Sure. I want to touch on what you just said about overcoming stage fright. In a sense, you will always have it. I still have it every time. 

There's a funny graph I show when I speak about this. I find a cool conference to apply to, and once I'm accepted, I start thinking, "Why did I apply? I'm too scared." I get anxious every single time. There's a love-hate relationship with public speaking—I know its benefits, but it still scares me. However, growth happens when you step out of your comfort zone and do something difficult. 

You shouldn't think that once you’ve overcome stage fright, it's gone forever. I know a 90-year-old theater actress who still experiences stage fright. She says it helps her become a better actress. She believes that the day she no longer feels it, she'll know it's time to stop because it’s an important part of the entire experience.

Jarek Jarzębowski: That's a great closing thought. Even though stage fright might be uncomfortable, we should appreciate it because it makes us better speakers. Moran, thank you very much for sharing your experience. If someone wants to dive deeper and work with you one-on-one, where can they contact you?

Moran Weber: You're welcome to connect with me on LinkedIn. You're also invited to join the Women on Stage community at womenonstage.net. I look forward to answering your questions, so please feel free to connect.

Jarek Jarzębowski: Moran, thank you once again. It was a pleasure. I believe this will be helpful for many people who want to start speaking or improve their public speaking skills. I hope we can speak again later on.

Moran Weber’s Background

Moran Weber is the CEO and Founder of Women on Stage, a community-driven platform empowering professional women in tech to share their knowledge and inspire others. With over a decade of experience as a Tech Lead at Wix and a strong foundation in software development, Moran combines her technical expertise with a deep understanding of human behavior, holding an MA in Social Psychology and a BSc in Computer Science and Psychology from Tel-Aviv University.

Moran’s journey is rooted in overcoming her own battles with stage fright and impostor syndrome, which fueled her passion for amplifying women's voices in tech. Today, she is a renowned speaker, speaker trainer, and advocate for gender equality in the industry, leveraging her unique blend of skills and experiences to drive meaningful change.

Women on stage

Closing Thoughts

Not everyone is born a natural speaker, but anyone can become one with the right techniques. Good preparation can do wonders, but the key is to focus on the story itself and make it your starting point. The path to feeling confident in public speaking may be long, but applying the principles listed above—such as understanding your audience, setting expectations, practicing out loud, and memorizing your introduction—will help you streamline the process.

In the end, it all comes down to emotions and the "why." Your audience wants to understand your motivation and share the feelings you have about your story. When paired with solid content, this simple approach always works - as Moran’s example proves. Ready to try it out?

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